I heard from Chonyi a few days ago. He had good news. The Chenpo Terma site we explored in April just one day before the earthquake is intact for now. The entry to the underground portrait room had been blocked, but a few dedicated and brave individuals, working slowly and in secret as usual, cleared away the collapsed rock and were able to enter once again. They even returned with the naljorpa who lives nearby to renew the blessings and protections on the site.
This development was so great, but it meant I had to soul-search all over again. I have been paralyzed, not knowing what to do, or not do. The location and the secrets behind it and the relic too have been hidden for over three hundred and fifty years. Events (like the earthquake) and some people’s bad intentions keep conspiring to keep them hidden. Am I just an overreaching American, a Scooby-Doo style meddler? People, nice people, are telling me I should let this lie, that I am making things worse – for myself and for their efforts to protect what is precious to them.
Then I turned on Coldplay. Listened to the song “Fix You.” “Lights will guide you home,” he crooned. And yes, tears did stream down my face.
I keep talking about physicists perpetuating dark, insidious theories about reality. Keep the lights out… just question the darkness! I preach. But we are all susceptible to its most basic form. Everyone experiences fear, some groups just build on it with fancy names and elaborate theories is all. Others of us conspire with it to hide a tough reality we are reluctant to face. My Tibetan friends have made a lifetime of commitments over generations to hide the Chenpo Terma, and they are afraid to let go.
Light is bound to reach us in the darkness. When we wait for it rather than reflexively turning on the self-conscious light of limited understanding, perhaps more so even, it may pain us, it may surprise us, but it will slowly warm and enliven us again. Our first thought in this new state should be, If there is a god, it is a Cosmic God.
Personally, my second thought was, Repeat to yourself, mantra-style, The paradox of revealing nothingness. The paradox of revealing nothingness. The paradox of revealing nothingness.
Preferable to The paradox of preaching hypocrisy, which is what I was toying with these last few days.
Ours is a paradox, in which nothingness may be revealed and somethingness is certainly hidden. I can only promise for now that the motive remains.